The Adventures of Lilac and The Flying Sea Lion
by xxemowriterzxx
Summary: Lilac is the new student at Hogwarts. She's woken up from a six year coma, and suddenly, is thrust into the world of magic. However, people slowly fall under a spell that wipes their memory, and it's up to Lilac, and her newfound magic to save the wizarding world.
1. Chapter 1: Everyone Loves Adventures

Hi, I'm Hjmilkop Bob-Joe Malfoy. Hjmilkop is pronounced Joe. I am 17 years old and 47/12ths. Reacently I have been diagnosed with 12 mental illnesses. I look in the mirror. My hair is black and is covering my right eye, as it always does on Fridays. It covers the right eye on Wensdays, Thursdays, and Sundays as well, and it covers my left eye on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Sundays. My left eye is showing because my hair is covering the right eye. I cant help but wounder sometimes why I look nothing like my parents. They both have blond hair and blue eyes, like my cousin Draco. I have brown eyes, and red hair that I die black useing majic. I also wear black eyeliner. Black is my favorite color. My Hogwarts robes are also black, but thats requied for the scool uniform. They are made of lether and have spikes. I am going to my seventh year at Hogwarts on Monday. My parents wanted me to be in Slytherin, but I ended up not fitting into any house. I am part of the Griffin-claw-slyther-puff house. I am the only member. Instead of a dormitory I sleep in a book cubord in the potions room.

I probably should also mention that I am an orphan. My parents died during my first year of Hogwarts. They died of despare because I wasnt in Slytherin. I am now walking aroung the dark castle I inherited. It is full of books. I read most of them in the summers after my parents died. This reading made me one of the smartest people in the school, maybe even smrater than Hermione Granger. But Horeminee was stupid anyways.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione are coming to Hogwarts this year. They are going to finish thier education because they missed most of their seventh year when they were fighting Voldemort.

As I keep walking I notice a book that I have not red before. It says TOPSECRET1!1!11!. I open it. Inside it has a familly tree of the Malfoy familly tree. I look under the names of my parents and see my name. Underneath it says "addopted, used to be a Weasley". I gasp. All this time I thought I was a Malfoy, but I am acctually a Weasley. This must be why all my official documents, incuding my OWLs have Hjmilop Bob-Joe Malfoy Weasley written on them, and the reason my hair is red and my eyes are brown. Who would have guessed?

I hear the doorbell ring. It must be my friend Lizard. She likes to be called Lizzy for short. I open the door. "Hi. I was adopted. I am a Weasley." I say.

"I already knew that" she says.

"What! Why didn't you tell me?" I say.

"I thought you already knew. Weasley was written on all your official documents and you look much more like a Weasel than a Malfoy." she says.

"Fine then. Come in girl." I say.

"Okay jellyfish." She says

I prefer to be referred to as jellyfish instead of as a boy or a girl. For example instead of being called him or her, he or she, boy or girl, witch or wizzard, I like to be called jellyfish. In case you are woundering I am sexually attracted to males and blood-of-young-child flavoured ice creame. Or at least I think I am. I have never fallen in love before yet. "How was the walk over here? I ask Lizzy.

"Terrible, there were so many mundanes - I mean mortals - I mean muggles getting in my way." She says.

I groan sympathetically in my mouth. "Can I see your wand?" Lizzard asks.

I bring out my wand. Lizzy loves it because it is unusual, but I hate it. Instead of wood it is made out of concrete. The core is made of dementor, causing me to nearly fail cheering charms, even though my teachers say its not the wands fault I'm so emo. The wand used to be 200 and 7/19 inches long. I broke it to make it shorter so it would stop attracting so much attention, but it is still the strangest wand in the school. I am a bit mad at Lizzy for making me show it to her so often, but it is hard to stay mad at her. I like her because she is an orphan like me. Her parents died when she was four during a tragic acident involving a flower pot. Ever since she has had a terrible flour phobia. I suddenly remember I put a bunch of black roses in my room. I quickly run up the stairs and throw them out the open window before Lizzy can see them. "Ready to go back to school?" I ask.

Lizzy says, "I can't wait to see the thestrals."

Ever since her parents died she has been obsessed with thestrals. I decide to play some emo music. Wizard emo music that is, not that lame muggle emo music. "I have been reading up on werewolves. Would'nt it be cool to be a werewolf?" I ask Lizzy.

She looks at me. "I think this year is going to be an adventure." She says ignoring my question.

"Everyone loves adventures" I say rolling my eyes.


	2. Chapter 2: Everyone Loves Lilac

_**A/N: Helloz everyeone! I'm rlly happy people are reading dis story. Makes me feel so hapy! Here iz the next chappie!**_

I must have fainted because when I woke up on the train platform nine and three quarters had already disapeared. Lizzy is sitting across from me. "What were you saying about werewolves on Friday?" asks Lizzy, who is sitting across from me.

"Oh, nothing." I say.

I do not want to reveal my plan. At school I will try to make a potion to turn myself into a werewolf, but I cant tell Lizzy because she is sure to tell one of the teachers. I hate it when teachers get in the way of my plans. There are going to be many new teachers at school this year. I dont care about most of them because I am only taking two classes, potions and divination. I am training to become one of those witches mundanes - I mean mortals - I mean muggles go to so they can get their fortunes told. The potions will help me cook up majick brews for them to buy. Divination will, of course, allow me to tell fortunes. I will be the most emo soothsayer ever to walk the earth.

Finally we get to Hogwarts. Lizard is delighted to see the thestrals. "Look Hjmilkob! Aren't they cute?" she tells me.

"They r qoot!" I yell back. (I can see them 666% because of my trajic backstory because my parentz wer killed by despair and becasue i'm super emo!)

I flip my black hair to cover my I becaus i need 2 look more emo. Then i remeber! It is the rong way. I part my hair to the other side, because it iz a monday, so it should be on the left side because it's Monday.

Inside the casle everyone is staring at Harry, Ron, and Hermione. Suddenly the sorting hat starts floating and talking. That is unusual, I think. "That one should be in SLYTHERINE11!111111!" says the hat pointing to Harry Potter at the Griffindore table.

"There must be some hat malfunchon" says Proffessor McGonigal, the Headmistres.

She stuffes the hat into a box. Then she goes on some rammble introdusing teachers and such. I ignore her for a while. I only take two classes and I already know my divination teachers are Proffessors Trelawny and Firenze. During most of the spech i contemplate the hopelessniss of life and the blackness in my soul 'cause im so emo. I tune back in when she introduces the potions teacher. I hope he is good because not only do I take classes in the potions room, I also use the cubboard as my bedroom. I am not disapointed. "The new potions teacher is Proffessor Snek, Proffessor Snape's second cusin once removed," says the Headministeress.

Proffesor Snek looks just like Profesor Snape, but he is wearing black eyeliner and had his black hair up in spikes. His robes look like they were stolen from dementors. His shiney, blak, pointed shoes shone shineyly in the candle light. Profezzor Snek had skin so pail it looks lik the ded faces of my ennemys. I can tell by his appearence that he is also emo.

On the way to the potions room i see a figure in the hall. I wonder if its Proffesor Snek. It turns out to be Harry Potter. "Hi," says Harry.

"Hi," I say, woundering whats going on.

"Are you a pureblood?" asks Harry.

"Yes," I say.

Harry nods at me, then, whithout another word, he says nothing more to me as he disapears into the night.

In the cubboeard I study my skedual. I have alot of frre time because Im only taking two classes. That is great news because I can use the rest of my time making a potion that could turn me into a werewolf. I look through one of the potions books until I find what im looking for. The potion to turn peple into werewolfs is called the Lilac potion for some reason. Everyone loves lilac.


	3. Chapter 3: Everyone Loves Flying

_**Ather Note: OMG I AM SOOOOOOOO SRRY 4 NOT POSTING. I HAVE HAD CRAYYYYYZZYYYY BIZY SUMMR! Anywayz, hear iz the next chappie for ya :)))**_

I look down the ingredients list for the Lilac potion. The ingreedients are: wolfsbane, hair from the tail of a wolf, a peice of paper with the word werewolf on it written by a werewolf, and a newt. (THIS is a vry hardd potoin and I can not not do it beacaz i am sooooo talentid) I think about were I coud get these things. We have wolfsbane and a newt in the potions room. There arent any werewolfs at the school so i will have to improvise. I could probably use hair from Firenzezes tail instead of a werewolf, and I could get him to write "Centaur" on paper while im at it. I decide not to start the potion untill tommorow, but im kind of board. I decide to go visit the Ravenclaw common room. I go there whenever im board. It is the only common room I can go into because instead of paswords they just require you to know random facts or solve riddlles.

You shuld know that im also really smurt becuz i read every boook in my dead paren'ts emo castel. It haz made me the smartest personn en Hugwarts.

My frist class doesn't start for another day and 33 minuts, so i lounge In the common room of Raveclaw. I changed my klothes befor i came here. I am now whearing a blood black cape and a scarf decorated with the blood of my enimees (and maybee my friends but u didn't need 2 no that). Eye make shure my hair is on the left sighed.

"Hjmilkop!" someone screamz.

I turn my emo hed and c that COlin Creevy is screaming my naim. Colon Creevey is training to be a Daly Profet photogorapher. He is also only taking too classes; photography and truth transphiguaration.

"Creepy!111!" I shout back. He iz also my best frend, after Lizzardd. But Liz is in Huffpuf, so I am not talking to hur write now. But Colin did'nt have miny freinds, so we gravityted to each other in the Ravenclaw comma room. "I am going to the library. Want to meat me their?" asks Colin.

I go to the library after laeving the Ravenclaw common room. In the library i c Harry, Ron, and Hermione. Harry is holding a pink pygmy puff. "Wait, you have a pygmy puff?" I say.

"I bought her after Hedwig died, her name is Overstated Mold Milpro," explanes Harry. "She is thirty 2 months and 40 + seven scnds old.

They leave back to the Griffendor comman room. Hjmilkop thinks that Hurry Potter likes jellyfish. I like Hary Pottter. I decided I shold start on the potion because i want to start. I ran so fast I flew down the hallway. Every0ne loves flying.


End file.
